Second Chances

Alright.

After much mental debate and persuasion (read: threats from friends)...

...I have decided to give Twitter yet another shot.

Come follow me.

www.twitter.com/zaziggystardust

And this better be interesting, dammit!

(deuces.)

The Rapture.

And I'm not talking about one of my favorite Anita Baker songs.
My grandmother always called the End of Days "The Rapture", and I never paid much attention to it because she used the phrase all the time, even when it was unecessary. It was funny. Just jokes. But now, I'm not so sure...grandma might be right.

Just over this weekend, we've had two mass shootings on Sunday. There was an incident in Santa Clara, California; an apparent murder-suicide that has left six people dead. Two were children. There is one more woman in the hospital in critical condition.

In Carthage, North Carolina, the term 'disturbing' reached new heights as a man went on a shooting spree at a nursing home, killing seven patients, one employee; and leaving three people wounded. The ages of the patients/victims ranged from 78-98, and the employee was 39. The man responsible for the shootings was shot and apprehended on the scene, and is now facing eight counts of murder and one count of felony assault on a police officer.

Let's not forget about the man who went in on a shooting rampage in Alabama, the man in Illinois who killed a church pastor and stabbed two church members, or the young man in Germany who killed 15 people before dying in a violent shootout with the police. The whole world is going to hell in a handbasket, FAST. And when I thought the nursing home shootings were vile enough (who the FU*K kills people's grandparents?!), I read something that made my heart sink to the pit of my stomach.

In Milton, Massachusetts, Kerby Revelus stabbed his 17 year old sister to death before decapitating his 5 year old sister in front of the police. He was then shot after he went after his 9 year old sister, who sustained defensive wounds to her hands, and stab wounds to her stomach and one of her legs. The picture to the the right is that of 17 year old Samantha and 9 year old Sarafina. Sarafina was the one that called the police after watching her older sister be murdered. The police officers who were on the scene are receiving counseling, as they described what they saw as "a killing field".

What the hell is going on with the minds of some of these people? It seems that things are getting worse and worse, with no sign of getting better. People are offing their families like they're...well, not family. Everday I'm fearing for my safety because I may be in the wrong place at the wrong time, and become a victim of someone's rage because their day started off wrong.

My thoughts and prayers go out to all families of the victims who are suffering at this time.

(deuces.)

To The Readers: Comment Convos

Just FYI for those who comment my posts, I do read AND reply to all comments. I love dialouge, so to those who post comments with questions/opinions, I will reply to your comment on my own comment board. Thanks again for showing your interest in the blog, keep it coming!

I'll have more updates on me and my brother's dinner with our brother soon, pics included!

(deuces.)

Ziggy's Friday Forethought 4: Blessings, NOT Burdens.

*photo courtesy of my Myspace page*


Two things I've discovered about myself in the past few months:

-I loathe complainers

-People without plans annoy me

These two things have always been something that bothered me, but as I'm kicking my life/career into 5th gear, my tolerance for nonsense is critically low. People who complain really work my nerves, and it's worse when people complain but do nothing to change what they're complaining about. I used to have a friends like this, but after many advice seeking conversations with me, they've discovered that Ziggy doesn't host pity parties. Ever. I'm not the kind of person to dwell on things that I can't change; I go into action and do whatever it takes to make sure there are no repeats.

Not having a general plan--you know, the "where do you see yourself in 5 years" theory--is something that only bothers me because I like to be around people who have goals and means of achieving them. I understand that sometimes there are lots of things that may form restraints, hindering you of reaching your goal...but if you don't have a goal, you have a serious problem. My two pet peeves coincide because when some people aren't happy about where they are in life, they complain rather than taking action. BOOOOOOOO. Whining about something doesn't change it for the better, it causes you to go further into the situation and analyze every aspect with "what ifs". I know for a fact that I have millions of things to complain about, but I don't want to block my blessings, so I thank God for the lesson and keep it moving, no matter how much it may hurt.

"Blessings, NOT Burdens". My personal mantra, if you will. If you are a person who is preoccupied with bitching and moaning about something that happened 4 months ago, you have no idea of the things that are passing you by. Opportunity knocks all the time, but every once in a while we lack the focus to answer. I used to be a complainer, someone who just dwelled on every little thing for entirely too long. I've since learned that I have so many things to be thankful for, and I know that more are on the way. Burdens are just a temporary obstacle to test our strength/faith/stability, and by complaining, you're letting the obstacle win. Regain your composure, dust yourself off and go back at it. Make friends with your same mindframe; being around people who will push you not only feels good, but it also brings better results than hanging with your Pity Party Crew.

Be blessed, and enjoy your weekend!

(dueces.)

damn, baltimore pt 2: No Title Needed. This is Utter Bullsh*t.

Just in case you were wondering, the Murder Map reports that Baltimore now has 51 homicides this year. But, that's not what this post is about. It's about the fact that the count almost went to 52...

...Scuba could've lost his life the other night.

I won't go into details because this isn't my story to tell, but I will say that I've never seen him so shaken up. Earlier that day, I had been texting him and getting no replies. The phone he had has been acting up for a while, so I logically concluded that that was the reason why; he's previously complained of not getting any messages from me, or getting them hours later. I try to keep the worst case scenario in the further recesses of my mind, I hate wigging out when it's not necessary. Apparently my worst case scenario was right.

I had no idea he was here, but he came to my house around 10:30 or so and had already talked to my parents about what happened. When he finally told me and our mutual friends, my heart sank. Supposedly someone came into his shop pretending to be a customer, asking for someone else who worked there. What happened after that sounded like a movie--the usual weapon brandishing, everybody-on-the-floor demands, and someone was pistol whipped. He also told us that he didn't know the gun was pointed at his head when the guy said, "If I don't get this money RIGHT NOW, I'm shooting him first." His phone, money, credit card and ID were stolen, but that's a blessing compared to what he could have taken. I'm just glad I didn't get that horrible phone call late at night.

I really don't understand what's going on with my people in this city, or anywhere really. It amazes me how people rob/kill people who live in the same area or even the same block as them. NEWS FLASH: that person you just popped? Trying to make it out just like you are. Great job, dumbass. What's sad is that I know for a fact that it'll get worse when the weather finally warms up for the next few months. We have to do better, seriously.

(deuces.)

Missing Pieces and Rolling Stones

As promised, I'm back, and boyyyyyy do I have a story to tell. I also noticed that I've been behind on some comments on the blogs I follow, so forgive me; I'm working my way back on track so you'll see something from me shortly!

Alright, I never blogged about this because I'm one of those "don't count your chickens before they hatch" type of people. I wanted things to pan out a little further before I opened my mouth, sometimes when you say something too soon things don't really happen the way you thought they would. I did, however, post a poem via my 30/30 a while back. But, everything seems to be going well so far, and I realized that I may have a reader (anon or otherwise) that has gone through or is going through the same thing, so why not share my story, right?

For the past few years, I've been looking for my older brother. My father told my brother and I about him when we were a little younger, I'd say I was 17 or 18. He never came as a surprise, especially after meeting a younger sister when I was 10, but I was always intrigued because he seemed like a sensitive subject to my father. Whenever I would ask about him, I got the same bits of information: first name (maybe the last), where he may be living...and now that I think about it, that's pretty much all I got. There were a lot of questions to go unanswered, like the question of why I didn't know him in the first place.

Fast forward to present time; last Monday. A coworker had given me a website that's used to locate people. I've tried different sites before and never got any desirable results, so I was a little skeptical of this site to say the least. I was also growing impatient; it was frustrating being the only one that was serious in finding my brother. My father's mother promised to try and find the last phone number she had that could help me, my brother's mother. No luck there. My father pretty much went into lockdown mode whenever I said my brother's name, so I gave up in asking him anything and decided to do this thing on my own. I'm playing around on the website, procrastinating really, when I decide to give it a shot. I type in my brother's name--and got way too many search results with too much information. Came to the conclusion that I would go back and try his name another time, so I tried typing in his mother's name. How crazy is it that ONE search result came up? The age was about right, the address and phone number were local...and the website had this feature that lists relatives linked to the search result--my brother's name was on the list. There was also a Norfolk, VA address linked to the search result, which was where I was told my brother lives. My gut told me to take a chance, so I wrote down the name, address and phone number of my who I believed to be was my brother's mother; and psyched myself up to call as soon as I got off from work.

IT WAS HER.

My mind was completely blown! She answered the phone, and once I asked "...is this Wilma *****?", things took off from there. She was surprised at how I found her information, and she of course had questions for me--how many more brothers and sisters I have, how old I am, why I wanted to find my brother, etc. Everything was moving so fast, I'd been actively looking for my brother for almost three years, and this is the closest I've gotten. Pretty damned good, right?! Our conversation went pretty smoothly, she assured me that she would give my brother my cellphone number. She couldn't promise that he would call, but she would talk to him because she believes we all have the right to "know who your siblings are, no matter the circumstancs between the parents". I thanked her for talking to me, ended the call and then cried in my car on the way home from work.

...and if you thought it was over...
*insert random 'can't stop, won't stop' Diddy soundbyte*

I'm happy to say my brother called last Friday! He's 38 years old, and I have two nieces and one nephew to add to my auntie roster. They're 20, 19 and 15. My brother's a Navy brat/retired police officer, which is totally ironic considering my distaste for law enforcement. The kicker to our whole conversation was that he told me he lives in northeast Baltimore. It may not seem like a big deal, but understand this: I spent a great deal of my mid-teenage life working in northeast as a mentor/performer, so I'm sure I've crossed him at least a few times, especially in his field. He sounds just like my other brothers, which leads me to believe that he looks exactly like daddy. But we'll see; he said he'd like to meet! I'm so excited and happy...and relieved. I feel like the piece that I thought was missing has been filled. I've always been unsettled with the possiblity that I could've went to school with one of my nephews/nieces (it happened before, I had a nephew in the same grade and same school), or perhaps my younger brother could have been pursuing his niece as a potential suitor, all because we didn't know who our family was! It's truly a blessing to have found him this fast. My mother's proud of me and how much passion I attacked this "case" with, but I find it unsettling knowing that I have a sibling that I don't even know what he looks like. That's about to change.

I'll keep you all updated as Operation: Family Unite/Expansion continues. In the meantime, if anyone has any stories of finding a loved one, sibling or not, feel free to hit up the comment section and spill your guts!

See, Riv? I had good darn reason to be gone, and it wasn't boo loving. Ha! :P

(deuces.)

friday forethought raincheck.

Sorry guys, no FF today. Had a lot going on this week that I'll be blogging about soon. Just need a couple of days to get back on track, and the postage will continue! Nothing negative, besides car trouble today (grrr), but there's a lot going on that needs my focus, so blogger will be on the backburner for a little bit. I'll be back soon. :o)

Everyone enjoy your weekend!

(deuces.)