Wednesday, February 11, 2009


Okay, so... I'd like to say I'm sort of tough. I mean, some may agree; judging by my posts, I really haven't posted anything I always talk about music, something random and always with a splash of humor, sarcasm and real thought. But, every so often, I let loose and simoultaneously let my guard down. It can be a good thing, a great thing...I just hate being too...mushy. If I'm not writing it in a poem, you won't hear it from me. My own defense mechanism. I'll let you in if I deem you worthy enough.

The only thing that gets me open is music. Music is a powerful thing, you know. High frequencies can make you feel alive, jubilant; while lower frequencies can drive emotions of anger and sexual energy. Listen to your favorite Plies song. That's why you feel like stabbing someone after getting it in with your chick...on the same song. Depending on what I'm listen to, if you pay attention you can almost easily determine my mood. I listen to what centers me in a given situation.

Now, if you've been reading, you'll remember my post about Beyonce (hilarious video included) a while back. Well, B's done it again, dammit. I only took a couple of listens to I Am...Sasha Fierce, so I didn't give it a chance to do my usual nerd thing and dissect every track. Recently, Scuba and I had been hitting some rough patches for a little while now, so naturally I've been turning to music to soothe me. I was sitting at the PC one day, letting iTunes randomly play out my life, and I stumble across some of the most beautiful lyrics I've heard...well, not most (do you listen to Phyllis Hyman?!), but given the situation, I was feeling a little sensitive at the time.

Damn you, Mrs. Knowles-Carter, for "Halo".

The song was so...necessary at that time; combined with my emotions of the moment, I was almost moved to tears. Some songs (if "formatted" correctly) can tap into your mental, and before you know it, you're belting along, picturing your loved one standing in front of you while you serve him what's his a la "And I'm Telling You I'm Not Going". Not that that was me or anything.

I'll have you know, Scuba and I are doing great. Life just has the habit of forcing lessons on you when you least expect it. But the truth is, and I tell him this on a daily basis, this is the best relationship I've been in...ever. The love is there, the respect is definitely there and he's my best friend, so we don't have to worry about awkward moments when it's time to have adult conversations. I could say so much about one man...but I'm tough, remember? That's all you get for one month.


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